I was back in Aish Hatorah. I guess like positivity childhood memories that resurfaced after I'd dealt with parental trauma, my subconscious felt I was ready to find some good beneath the wreckage. The building was even bigger and more...
Shame is a bitch. A motherfucking cuntbusting bitch. Of all negative emotions, it’s the one that hits me the hardest, because it challenges my very existence. To stare in the face of your shame is to stare into...
Psychedelics have played a key part in my growth and healing past traumas. When I have spoken about them in the past, more people have asked me about my experiences, and I finally sat down to complied a rough overview of my own...
It’s hard to be compassionate when you’re afraid. And charedim are afraid of everything. Of God, of change, of novelty. Growing up, a healthy dose of compassion would have gone a long way, but there was none to be found. Yiras Shomayim, fear of God, is what...

Current Weather in Hell

clear sky
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Even More Freidom

Love Thy Neighbor, Hate Thyself

Around two years ago, one of my siblings was struck in a hit and run...

A Life of Service

Avreml Zingelwald kicks off his shoes and jumps into the freshly dug grave. He’s done...

The Flag of Conflict

Even in this time of crisis, I am incredibly conflicted about the Israeli flag. 

Chapter #6: Yeshiva Gedola

12th grade is the first year of Yeshiva gedola. Literally the big leagues, this is...

The Smiling Rabbi

Interesting anecdote about this book cover. It's a composite of two different Rabbi faces, i.e....