I am not above criticism any religion or social institution.
I spend most of my time calling out Orthodox Judaism because I am intimately familiar with its fuckeries and am haunted by its residues in my psyche.
But I think it’s important on occasion to criticize some other sacred cows, to balance things out and show that I hate everyone equally. Islam? Fuck that shit. ‘Religion of peace’, my ass. Christianity? Has millions of deaths to account for in the name of love.
This time I want to talk about Buddhism. And what’s interesting here is that I’m generally into Buddhism.
When I left Judaism, I encountered key Buddhist ideas that were much more aligned with how I experienced the world, and techniques for self-regulation that I had been missing my whole life.
At the same time, as I have explored Buddhism further, several things have become apparent.
Firstly, the entire brand of Buddhism that I’ve encountered is actually a watered-down, westernized version with some of the worst parts of the religious aspects of it removed. It is similar to Reform Judaism, the flavor that most non-Jews are able to say ‘oh, Judaism is so quaint and friendly and accepting’ about. And the same type that I, raised Orthodox, would call out for being inauthentic and not rooted in tradition. I have a friend who was raised religious Buddhist and was deeply traumatized by many aspects of it. In addition to the emotional scars, she bears physical scars on her arm from when she was branded as a child as part of an affirmation of faith ritual. This is not the Buddhism most of us are exposed to, but it is out there in force.
Second, the constant talking about enlightenment, as though that’s some sort of measurable state that can actually be achieved. Instead of viewing personal growth as a continuous spectrum for improvement with no discernible end, which I believe is more aligned with reality, Buddhist teachers – even the western ones – often refer to this goal as a milestone to strive for. Not only is this not realistic, it actually introduces a whole new set of cravings and striving to one’s practice, which is the antitheses of what the entire practice aims to achieve. It’s hard enough to remove one’s ego from the practice even with just our human condition to account for. There is no need to introduce additional layers of dogma to the mix.
Finally, there is the human component. No matter how ideal the raw premise might be, by the time it comes around to people actually implementing it, things start to break down. First we have a rich tradition, starting with Buddha himself and continuing with prominent teachers like Tejaniya, who were deadbeat dads who left their children behind to seek the aforementioned enlightenment. It’s a lot easier to be enlightened when you’re not dealing with your fucking kids.
Then there are the more western teachers I have encountered on the few meditation retreats I have been on. Similar to the amount of fucked up therapists out there, the majority of them seem to be engaged in some sort of complex form of spiritually bypassing – immersing in a practice that is supposed to refine them as people while presenting with glaring personality flaws that they seem to not be aware of. I am allergic to this kind of shit from my decades of experiencing Kiruv rabbis with agendas, and often the parallels are striking. Techniques like posturing, deflection, and false humility abound, and they seem no more equipped than anyone else to answer a question that veers from the scripts they have been taught to address.
My favorite story that speaks to this last point is an experience from the last day of the last meditation retreat I was on. A fundraiser presented to us, about our opportunity to become monthly supporters. Anyone who pledged over $10 a month would be entitled to a much-coveted meditation retreat-branded tote bag.
The room erupted in a flurry of inquiries. People who had been meditating in silence for a week on the principles of non-attachment broke their silence to inquire how they, too, might be able to acquire said tote despite not perfectly fitting the previously stated criteria. The presenter appeared flustered – they had not been prepared for an onslaught of questions about tote bag availability. She pledged to escalate the matter to those with the Power to Distribute Tote Bags. She had to promise this multiple times, to the multiple people who took issue with the current toteless state of the world. Suffering abounded.
Still, the one advantage that Buddhism seems to posses over most other religious is that when you strip things back to the very original teachings, looking past the flawed personalities and before the addition of endless traditions and laws added over millennia, the core ideas hold an amount of philosophical truth to them, with practical application and benefits. This already steps it above the core teachings of Judaism or Islam, which are just a bunch of violent bullshit in a box.
So I guess I’ll take what I can get.
(It’s a pretty nice tote)
