Satire
Dvar Torah Generator
Attending a Bar Mitzvah and lost for words?
Trying to impress your future father in...
Love Me, Daddy
“You know what Olam Habah is?” Explains the Slonimer Rebbe. “Olam Habah is the entire...
Conditioning for Pleasure
I’ve been working with a coach on experiencing pleasure. It’s not that I haven’t experienced...
Happy
I think this one actually best expresses the issue that bothers me the most.
Freidom Fighter Profiles a Famous Kiruv Rabbi
In the hyperbolic style of Mishpacha Magazine. Inspired by bullshit like this.
Mild mannered and unassuming,...
Returning to Footsteps
My partner and I recently attended a retreat organized by Footsteps, the organization that supports...
Book Covers
If I had a dollar for every time someone told me this, I'd have enough money to start my own religion. Or at least my own congregation. Same difference, really.
Everyone seems to have some magical elusive Judaism that I'm missing out on."Your Judaism is not like my Judaism.""You should...
In Judaism, we're taught, everything has the right context.
Some days, you shouldn't eat anything.Other days, you should stuff yourself like a pig.
Some days you shouldn't have sex at all.Other days, sex is a big mitzvah.
Some days, you should be happy.Other days, sad.And others still, you should get so blacked...
“There are no atheists in a foxhole,” Noah Weinberg used to love to say, swiftly eradicating all actual atheists who undoubtedly have existed in foxholes.
That statement further disregards all the individuals who became atheists in foxholes, like the blaspheming Rabbi in Elie Wiesel’s Night.
From the moment I...
Biography
Philosphy
Meaning’s Search for Man
When I left religion, I lost the reason to get out of bed in the morning.
Aish...
Our Father in Heaven
Our father in heaven they sayThe father of mercyBut as an almighty beingHe hath chosen to live...
Well, Take Care Then: A Polyamorous Journey to Nowhere
“I’m poly,” I wrote her. “So it’s complicated.”
“How come I’m only finding out now?” She wanted to...
Fiction
Lifetime Guarantee
Avrumi Zeivald was prepared to meet his maker. Or at least a maker. Someone’s, even if not his.
The Torah, the Rabbis had assured him,...
Kiruv
“Judaism is about relationships,” sayeth the narrative. “It’s about aligning yourself with truth. It’s about becoming more like God, so that you can connect with God (how that doesn’t work is the subject of a separate article).”
Furthermore, “Only dim witted people, like women and children (a pretty direct paraphrase from Maimonides), follow the Torah for the sake of reward.”
Oh...
A key Aish tactic in proving God’s existence, was emphasizing the unusual.
There is no nation as oppressed as the Jews.
No other nation claims public revelation.
No other book can spell the word Pizza or Hitler with this unique arrangement of letters.
This tactic is a huge part of the discovery seminar, and the idea is that this thing is so unique...