I have long had a tenuous relationship with Israel. Israelis as a collective bug the shit out of me. Rude, bureaucratic, with very little sense of tact, sophistication, or anything that I perceived as culture. I never really was Israeli – despite being born there, Hebrew is my second...
“Judaism is about relationships,” sayeth the narrative. “It’s about aligning yourself with truth. It’s about becoming more like God, so that you can connect with God (how that doesn’t work is the subject of a separate article).” Furthermore, “Only dim witted people, like women and children (a pretty direct paraphrase...
In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And water. And light. And trees. And all the other stars and the moon and the sun too. Yes, in that order, motherfuckers, it says so right there in the book. And the fishes. And the animals. And the...
If you believe in God from a philosophical point of view, you shouldn’t need any emotional scaffolding to keep things up. The absurdity of one-off inspirational stories of any kind should be obvious to even the most casual of contemplators, and yet it forms a huge part of religious culture. I...
Good news: if you have money, even being A Good Jew in The Eyes of God™ is easier. Instead of slaving away getting your house clean for Passover, just sell your house to a non-Jew (awesome loophole, Rabbis!) and go to the nearest tropical resort you can find. There, you...
The kiruv world prides itself in its open-mindedness. "Ask us anything! We will change our views in a heartbeat if you convince us! Sure you can ask about sex, and no, we don't use a hole in the sheet, we're super progressive!" But ask yourself, have any of the really difficult...
https://soundcloud.com/shalom-tzvi-shore/with-alex-shandrovsky Recently, in light of recent events, a friend of mine asked to have a call with me, which was quite awesome, and to record it, which was cool. We ended up discussing a whole bunch of stuff - why I write this stuff on Facebook and what it's been like for...
So it had come to this. He was dead, and it was judgement time. His first grade Rebbe had warned him about this moment. Rosh Hashanah davening had reminded him of it. And now, 83 years later, it was really happening. “When you arrive in heaven, you’ll stand before God on...
zilbermans freidom fighter
There’s a little booklet you can get, and it tells you when you can worship God. He’s available from 6:43 AM until 8:42. After that he’ll be pissed that you missed your appointment. There’s a Siddur you can get, with a compass in the cover. It shows you which direction...

Current Weather in Hell

Hell
clear sky
44.5 ° F
44.5 °
43.8 °
93 %
1.6mph
0 %
Wed
49 °
Thu
45 °
Fri
39 °
Sat
40 °
Sun
40 °

Even More Freidom

On Mental Health

Mental health in the Orthodox world is a catastrophe. It's gotten marginally better in the Orthodox community...

The Flag of Conflict

Even in this time of crisis, I am incredibly conflicted about the Israeli flag.  I completely support Israel’s...

Love Thy Neighbor and All That Jazz

Remember to love thy neighbor, especially if they are not Jewish/religious and are showing signs of...

Pew Pew

Gedlya Goldfinger holstered his PsalmRay. Whereas the rest of the Goyishe Velt used neutron chips and nanotechnology to...

The Rabbi, The Rapist, and The Printing Press – A Tale of Mystery and Intrigue

Yeedle Kugelmacher was a pedophile. Not those shady, creepy people who need to register as sex offenders....